11 Ways To Create and Maintain Balance (part one) by Chalene Johnson

1. Prioritize, in writing, the most important areas of your life based on your current situation. Many skip this all-important first step or fail to re-visit this question on a regular basis. Although you may believe you have prioritized your values, goals or agendas in your mind, listing them on paper helps to clarify their importance, so you can re-evaluate your activities. Our top priority is often easy to identify, its numbers 2, 3 and 4 priorities that sometimes over-lap in our minds and fluctuate depending on changing circumstances. Writing down your priorities makes it easier to make tough decisions.

Be ready to “shift and move”. As circumstances change, so will your priorities, therefore, so should your schedule. Any shift in circumstances, work-load, family, finances, health, etc. should require you revisit your written list of priorities.



2. Create a calendar, or list, of your regularly scheduled activities. List everything, including leisure time and sleep. Closely estimate the amount of total time each activity requires. For example, when listing a class or client, be sure to include set-up, cleanup and drive time.



3. Star those activities that support one or all of your top 2 or 3 priorities. These are the items you should fight to keep on your list, but be careful you don’t have too many! Fitness is on my list of priorities, but when too many workouts cut into family time (my first priority) then a few work outs need to be moved.



4. Underline neutral activities. Neutral activities are those which neither take from, nor support, your priorities. Some examples of neutral activities might include Saturday morning coffee with your girlfriends, art class, watching television, surfing the internet, etc. These are activities that you could give up if needed, but should be evaluated for their “peace of mind” value. Never underestimate the refueling power of mindless down time, something few A-type personalities allow for.



5. Next, boldly circle the activities or obligations that contradict your present order of priorities. This is going to take some courage. In some instances, it takes a non-objective 3rd party. Here’s a personal example: One of my weekly activities was a late evening class at a health club 35 minutes away, at a rate of pay far less than I normally earned. I had the class for years and felt the students, who had become my friends, would “perish” if I gave up the class. Even though I was a new Mom, I felt I’d be letting them down if I gave it up. I was keeping the class out of guilt, a sense of obligation and, to be honest, ego gratification! It took a friend to point out, that by keeping the class, I was actually hurting my young family in terms of loss of time with them. Giving up that class was far less painful than I imagined.

Now, when I personally struggle with the decision to get a sub or give up a class, I remind myself that at the end of my life, I want my family at my bedside, not my Saturday morning step class.



6. Make an “Immediate Action” To- Do List: Each item which you bravely circled now needs to be removed. These aren’t areas that you’re going to “try to do better.” It’s time to take specific action. There are no ifs, ands, or buts about it. The change doesn’t have to be permanent, but it should be immediate. If the act of relinquishing responsibility, inconveniencing others, or change has you frozen in your tracks, look at your top three priorities and find the courage to endure a few uncomfortable moments for lasting peace of mind.

The next steps will be coming tomorrow! Enjoy1

Lori

Lori McDowell
Helping Families Work From Home since 1999
www.momsforgreen.com

Happiness Quotes

The following are my favorite Happiness Quotes:

Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important. ~Janet Lane

A happy thought is like a seed that sows positivity for all to reap. ~Miriam Muhammad

Joy is a flower that blooms when you do. ~Author Unknown

I can only think of one thing greater than being happy and that is to help another to be happy, too. ~Jim Thomson

Some pursue happiness, others create it." ~Author Unknown

Happiness always looks small while you hold it in your hands, but let it go, and you learn at once how big and precious it is. ~Maxim Gorky

Happiness is not a station you arrive at, but a manner of traveling. ~Margaret Lee Runbeck

Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. ~Abraham Lincoln

They seemed to come suddenly upon happiness as if they had surprised a butterfly in the winter woods. ~Edith Wharton

The best vitamin to be a happy person is B1. ~Author Unknown

You will never be happier than you expect. To change your happiness, change your expectation. - Bette Davis

A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes. -Hugh Downs

Happiness held is the seed; happiness shared is the flower. ~Author Unknown

he only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are & not who people think you are. ~ G. Hawn

The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself. ~Benjamin Franklin

Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action. ~Benjamin Disraeli

Think of all the beauty that's still left in and around you and be happy! ~Anne Frank

I hope you enjoyed these quotes and you are able to find happiness. It is great to spread happiness and this is also from the "I Am Happy Project".

To your Success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Today I Will Make A Difference

Read the following and just imagine if everyone did the following activities! It would make such a huge difference for so many people. Just something to think about!


Today I will make a difference. I will begin by controlling my thoughts. A person is the product of his thoughts. I want to be happy and hopeful. Therefore, I will have thoughts that are
happy and hopeful. I refuse to be victimized by my circumstances. I
will not let petty inconveniences such as stoplights, long lines, and
traffic jams be my masters. I will avoid negativism and gossip.
Optimism will be my companion, and victory will be my hallmark. Today I
will make a difference.

I will be grateful for the twenty-four hours that are before me. Time is a precious commodity. I refuse to allow what little time I have to be contaminated by self-pity, anxiety, or boredom. I
will face this day with the joy of a child and the courage of a giant.
I will drink each minute as though it is my last. When tomorrow comes,
today will be gone forever. While it is here, I will use it for loving
and giving. Today I will make a difference.

I will not let past failures haunt me. Even though my life is scarred with mistakes, I refuse to rummage through my trash heap of failures. I will admit them. I will correct them. I will press
on. Victoriously. No failure is fatal. It's OK to stumble...I will get
up. It's OK to fail...I will rise again. Today I will make a difference.

I will spend time with those I love. My spouse, my children, my family. A man can own the world but be poor for the lack of love. A man can own nothing and yet be wealthy in relationships.
Today I will spend at least five minutes with the significant people in
my world. Five quality minutes of talking or hugging or thanking or
listening. Five undiluted minutes with my mate, children, and friends.

Today I will make a difference.

Max Lucado
From "On The Anvil"
Copyright (Tyndale Publishing, 1985) Max Lucado, Used by Permission

With more than 28 million books in print, Max Lucado has touched millions with his signature storytelling writing style. Awards and accolades follow Max with each book he writes. You can visit
his web site at: www.maxlucado.com

I know this is going to be my new motto and I hope it is yours too!

To your Success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Lessons In Forgiveness From A Sack Of Potatoes

One of my teachers had each one of us bring a clear plastic bag and a sack of potatoes. For every person we refused to forgive for whatever they did, we were told to choose a potato, write on it the name and date, and put it in the plastic bag.

We were then told to carry this bag with us everywhere for two weeks, putting it beside our bed at night, on the car seat when driving, next to our desk at work, etc.

The hassle of lugging this around with us made it clear what a weight we were carrying spiritually and emotionally, and how we had to pay attention to it all the time to not forget it and leave it in embarrassing places.

Naturally, the condition of the potatoes deteriorated. This was a great metaphor for the price we pay for nursing our grudges. Too often we think of forgiveness as a gift to the other person while it clearly is for ourselves!

So the next time you decide you can’t forgive someone, ask yourself, Isn’t your bag heavy enough?

This is a great lesson for all of us to learn from and remember as we go about our busy lives. This was sent to me by Artrell Harris.

I hope this touches you in some way.

To Your Success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Starting a Business Tips

We know what it’s like. You have a great idea and are ready to begin building your business, but how do you know where to start? What are the first steps that you should take? Below are a few tips to get you started in the right direction.


Have a Plan & Work That Plan
The first step toward starting a business is to have a plan in place. Most successful businesses take the time to make sure they have a blueprint to success, a plan. When you have a blueprint and a direction to go, you will be so much more successful. There are many free resources across the Internet that can aid you in structuring and thinking through the writing of your business plan. Once you get the plan in place, follow it!

Don’t Try To Do It All Yourself
A wise business owner knows that they can’t do it alone. Even if you have a small budget to begin with, you can enlist the help of a virtual assistant or possibly volunteers or mentors. Get more on board who have experience that can help you in your business.

Know Your Audience (and why they would be interested in your products or services)
Who are you trying to reach? Who needs your product or information? Take the time to do market research and list out who you are selling to and where you can find them – both online and offline. This will help you both when creating the product/service and in your marketing efforts. Also, make sure you keep in touch with your audience and find out how they feel. You can easily create surveys and find out valuable information about what they really think.

Be Clear On Your Rates
You must be clear not only with potential clients, but you must know for yourself what you need to earn. Be brutally honest with yourself about how much you need to earn to keep your business afloat. Now set realistic goals and figure out how to make that happen. Remember in setting your rates that often times you are selling the value of your services or products, and not necessarily the service or product itself.

You Gotta Want It
Someone asked me once why I thought some entrepreneurs succeeded while others, just as talented, failed. My answer? Those that succeeded wanted it bad enough to do whatever it took to make it happen. Running a business isn’t easy, especially in the beginning. There will be long hours, tough critics and disappointments that can’t be prepared for. The entrepreneur who works through the tough times is the one who succeeds in the end.

Get Busy
Don’t wait until you “have it all together” to take that first step – it will never happen. If you have a great idea and have done enough planning to know where you’re headed, go for it. Be prepared to learn some lessons. Be prepared to make changes along the way. But, if you never take the first step you’ll never know the joy of the journey.

———–
Jill Hart of Christian Work at Home Moms, CWAHM.com. and Diana Ennen of VirtualWordPublishing.com are the co-authors of So You Want To Be a Work-at-Home Mom. For more tips visit http://SoYouWantToBeaWAHM.com.

I love this article from Jill Hart and Diana Ennen. They give such great advice and it is very realistic, as well as honest advice. Check out their website for more great information, www.cwahm.com. I listen to their tips!


To your Success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Here are 7 Ways To Help You Feel Good!

1. Wake Up !!

Decide to have a good day.
'This is the day the Lord hath made;
let us rejoice and be glad in it.'
Psalms 118:24


2. Dress Up !!

The best way to dress up is to put on a smile.
A smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.
'The Lord does not look at the things man looks at.
Man looks at outward appearance,
but the Lord looks at the heart.'
I Samuel 16:7


3. Shut Up!!

Say nice things and learn to listen.
God gave us two ears and one mouth,
so He must have meant for us to do twice as much listening as talking.

'He who guards his lips guards his soul.'
Proverbs 13:3


4. Stand Up!!

. . . for what you believe in.
Stand for something or you will fall for anything.
'Let us not be weary in doing good; for at the proper time,
we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good...'
Galatians 6:9-10



5. Look Up !!

. . to the Lord.
'I can do everything through Christ who strengthens me'.
Philippians 4:13


6. Reach Up !!

. . for something higher.
'Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and lean not unto your own understanding.
In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path.'
Proverbs 3:5-6



7. Lift Up !!

. . your Prayers.
'Do not worry about anything; instead
PRAY ABOUT EVERYTHING.'
Philippians 4:6


I hope this helps as you grow daily in the Lord. I know it helps me! This can help you get through the tough times you maybe facing in your life or in your business.

Have a Blessed Day!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Can Your Ego Kill Your Business?

This article is by MaryEllen Tribby.

During my career I have hired, trained and mentored hundreds of people.

I can usually determine after the first week of working with someone what their “make or break” is. I can conclude if they will excel or will be mediocre and the underlying characteristics that will prevail.

Over the years I have earned about a 95% success rate. Meaning my initial assessment turns out to be correct. You would think I would be elated with that number – but there is just something about that 5% that just plain saddens me.

I have banged my head against the wall trying to figure out why I care about that 5%. Why that damn 5% makes me so sad. And finally it hit me – it is because of the wasted potential!

It is seeing the extraordinary gift in someone go to waste.

Years ago while heading up a large financial publishing company, I hired a rising superstar. Because I recognized this early on, I spent a great deal of time mentoring her as well as introducing her to other people in the industry.

Our boss/employee relationship blossomed into a wonderful friendship and we began spending time together socially with our spouses and children.

When she was ready to move on, I encouraged her to do so. I even recommended her to an industry legend that was starting a new business.

On my recommendation he hired her and in the beginning she excelled.

But then she soon left that position to start her own little consulting company.

She quickly acquired clients using my name as bait.

Initially I did not have a problem with this until the “buzz” in the industry was that she is not always delivering assignments on time and is getting increasingly harder to deal with.

We hadn’t communicated since she went off on her own. Then, a few months ago, I received an e-mail from her.

She asked if we could have lunch so she could pick my brain regarding her consulting business. She admitted she was overwhelmed taking on too much work and did not know what to do about it. Because we both have busy schedules, we had to set the date for two weeks down the road.

Two days before our scheduled lunch, I e-mailed her to say I was looking forward to seeing her and to confirm the time and place.

I was shocked by her response. She had forgotten all about it. She said she was too busy, and asked if we could please meet the following day instead.

I couldn’t make it the following day. And I was understandably miffed, because I’d had to re-schedule several appointments to free up the day and time we’d originally set. As I tried to explain this to her, I felt sudden heartbreak. Here was someone whose ego was destroying her business.

Whether you are working in a corporate environment or on your own, you should always be building relationships. Relationships with your customers, your competitors, and certainly with your current and previous mentors.

The best and easiest way to do so is to:

Follow my simple business ABC’s for sucess:

A) Always put yourself on the same playing field: Never think you are more important than anyone else. Some people may be more famous – but we are all equally important. I pride myself on treating everyone I meet with mutual respect. It does not matter to me what someone’s job title is – when they do that job with dignity and urgency, they deserve my respect.

B) Be thankful: Wake up everyday with a sense of gratitude. I am so grateful for the people in my live. Yes my family is a given, but also the mentors I have had that helped me achieve my success. It does not matter if they were a mentor from 10 years ago or 10 minutes ago, if anyone of them called me and asked for anything I would jump through hoops of fire to make it happen.

C) Communicate carefully: This starts with not over committing. It is a common blunder when starting out in business to take on too many clients in fear that the clients may not be there next month or next year. But when you actually turn down business and only accept the amount of business that you can handle your business will grow.

Remember if you take people for granted… and start putting yourself ahead of them… you’ll be burning valuable bridges that you will be sure to need down the road.


I think this is a great article and reminder for anyone in the corporate world or anyone who owns thier own business. You really need to care about people and respect people's time, as well as thier situation. Everyone had different circumstances and it is important to be aware of them at all times. I will help anyone who wants my help. It is such a great feeling to help others accomplish thier dreams.

I hope this gave you something to think about and can make a difference in your life.

To your Success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

What Will You Be Doing 7 Years From Now?

I thought this was a a great story to share with everyone! It is so true!

I graduated from Brazosport High School in Freeport, Texas in May 1972. Not dressed in white (honors), but I graduated.

That summer like the previous summer, I worked as a longshoreman loading corn, flour and corn sacks weighing 50 to 140 lbs. and 900 lbs. caustic soda drums on freight ships bound to other countries at nearby Brazos Harbor and Dow Chemical A2 Dock.

This was one of the better paying jobs in the area. It was grueling, hard, heavy work, but I loved it at the time. My father had been doing this job most of his life since it paid well.

Fall came around and I had already decided that I did not want to make my living as a longshoreman. Work was inconsistent and when it was there it only went to the ones with the most seniority, unless there was too much. There was very little opportunity for a better job when you got older.

I had always heard that a college education would get you a better job and decided to find out. So I went to nearby Brazosport College and set up an appointment with a counselor.

I got to his office at the appointed time and he asked me what work or profession interested me the most. I had taken Auto Mechanics I & II during my junior and senior years in high school and asked him if Brazosport College had an auto mechanics
program.

He said "no." I asked him if they had anything similar to it. He said that the Machine Tools Technology program was very similar and described the program to me.

I was very interested and asked him how long it would take if I went full time. He said "4 years." I said I couldn't go full time since I am working (whenever work was available).

I asked how long would it take if I go part time? He said "7 years." I was shocked. I said, "Man, I'll be old then, I'll be 25 years old. I don't think so."

He asked me, "what did you say you did for a living right now?" I told him again that I worked as a longshoreman throwing bags and manhandling drums. Then he bent over his desk and looked me square in the eye and asked me the most significant words I will never forget in my life:

"IF YOU DON'T TAKE ANY CLASSES. WHAT WILL YOU BE DOING 7 YEARS FROM NOW?"

These words hit me like a ton of bricks! I sheepishly told him that I would be doing the same thing. I signed up for the classes right then and there.

These prophetic words have inspired many of my relatives and friends. The sun will rise and fall 365 days a year. What you choose to do in between will determine many things in your life. This story alone has inspired relatives and friends to realize an age-old truth: Time will go on regardless and it waits on nobody.

Years later, I told a co-worker this story. He got inspired enough that he went on and got 3 different degrees in computers in less than 7 years! He said afterwards, "7 years ago I would've been saying to myself, 'If only I had the opportunity.'"

TIME WILL PASS REGARDLESS!Augie Mendoza

I am sure we have all felt this way at one time or another. I know I have missed opportunities in the past and I always wondered what if? That is why I am so proud that 2 years ago I did not let the Internet Ceo Moms opportunity pass me by. It has been such a blessing for our family because we are healthier, using better products, saving money and helping others families do the same thing.

To your Success!


Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com

Famous Momisms

I think at one time or another we have all heard the famous mom sayings, I know I did and it is scary now, I am starting to use them. The circle of life.

· Money does not grow on trees.

· If I talked to my mother like you talk to me....

· Always change your underwear; you never know when you'll have an accident.

· Be careful or you'll put your eye out.

· What if everyone jumped off a cliff? Would you do it, too?

· You have enough dirt behind those ears to grow potatoes!

· If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

· Don't put that in your mouth; you don't know where it's been!

· Be careful what you wish for, it might come true.

· What's meant to be, is meant to be.

· I hope that when you grow up, you have kids "Just Like you"!

· Because I'm your mother that's why.

· If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times.

· If you fall out of that tree and break your leg, don't come running to me.

· Because I said so.

· Just wait till your father gets home.

· No dessert till you clean off your plate.

I brought you into this world and I can take you OUT !!

· I've got eyes in the back of my head, that's how

· Just you wait until you have kids of your own - then you'll understand

· I slave for hours over a hot stove and this is the thanks I get?!

· Honestly... You'd lose your head if it wasn't on your shoulders!

Here are some interesting “Top Sayings From Biblical Mothers”


· Samson! Get your hand off of that lion. You don't know where it's been! (Judges 14:5-8)

· David! I told you not to play with that sling in the house! Go practice your harp. We pay good money for those lessons!

· Abraham! Stop wandering around the countryside and get home for supper!

· Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego! I told you never to play with fire!

· Cain! Get off your brother! You're going to kill him some day!

· Noah! No, you can't keep them! I told you, don't bring home any more strays!

· Gideon! Have you been hiding wheat in that wine press again? Judges 6:11)

· James and John! No more burping contests at the dinner table, please. People are going to call you the sons of thunder! (Mark 3:17)

· Judas! Have you been in my purse again?!

And the number one biblical saying of mothers is:

· Jesus! Stop working on that old wood and come in and eat! You'd spend you life on that wood, if your father asked you to!*



I hope you enjoyed these Momisms and it has brighten your day.


To your success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Rubber, Metal or Glass?

Tim Sanders is the former chief solutions officer at Yahoo! and the author of a book called Love Is the Killer App. He shares the following thought about establishing priorities:
Take your life and all the things that you think are important, and put them in one of three categories. These three categories are represented by three items: glass, metal, and rubber.
The things that are made of rubber, when you drop them, will bounce back. Nothing really happens when these kinds of things get dropped. So, for instance (and I enjoy sporting events, so don't take me wrong here), if I miss a Seahawks' game, my life will bounce along real fine. It doesn't change anything and nothing is lost—my missing a game or a season of football will not alter my marriage or my spiritual life. I can take 'em or leave 'em.
Things that are made of metal, when they get dropped, create a lot of noise. But you can recover from the drop. You miss a meeting at work, you can get the cliff notes. Or if you forget to balance your checkbook and lose track of how much you have in your account, and the bank notifies you that you have been spending more than you have—that's going to create a little bit of noise in your life, but you can recover from it.
Then there are things made of glass. And when you drop one of these, it will shatter into pieces and never be the same. Even though you can piece it back together, it will still be missing some pieces. It certainly won't look the same, and I doubt that you could actually fill it up with water, because the consequences of it be being broken will forever affect how it's used.
The thing is, you're the only person who knows what those things are that you can't afford to drop.
Posted by CEO Mom Amber McGowan.

This is a great post from another leader on Internet Ceo Moms. We are so fortunate to have so many great leaders on our team.

I hope this post helps you in some way.

To your Success

Lori

Fill free to check out my website at: www.momsforgreen.com

Life Lessons From A Pencil

1.) EVERYTHING YOU DO WILL ALWAYS LEAVE A MARK.

2.) YOU CAN ALWAYS CORRECT THE MISTAKES YOU MAKE BY USING THE ERASER.

3.) WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS WHAT IS INSIDE OF YOU.

4.) IN LIFE, YOU WILL UNDERGO PAINFUL SHARPENINGS,
WHICH WILL ONLY MAKE YOU BETTER.

5.) TO BE THE BEST PENCIL, YOU MUST ALLOW YOURSELF
TO BE HELD AND GUIDED BY THE HAND THAT HOLDS YOU.


I hope this helps as you become a better person each day.


This was sent to me by Artrell Harris who is the VP of Mission Services / Chaplain for the YMCA.

I love this because it is so simple and so true about life. I think so many people try to complicate their lives when they really do not need to.

Have a great day!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com

WAHM - Work Schedules

This is another great article of information posted by another mom on Internet Ceo Moms Suzanne Conant. This is great advice.

Just because you're a WAHM, it doesn't mean you're the welcome mat for everyone else. You're a work at home Mom who's not only taking care of her family, but contributing to the family's income. Your job working at home is just as important as someone's job outside the home.

The challenge for many Moms working from home is not making it clear to family and especially to friends that being a WAHM means you have work or business priorities to tend to. Here are some tips to help you make it clear to the people around you aware of your work schedule.

Sit down with your family members and show them your schedule. This schedule can be posted somewhere prominent in the house for reference. Explain to them what your job or business is about. The more they understand what you do and why you can't be disturbed from so and so time the less interruptions you will get.

If you treat your work at home business like a real business, how you present yourself as being a business person will shine through and people will take you seriously. If you act like your business is no big deal then your friends will think it's just a hobby and expect you to have time to chat on the phone, go for coffee or even use you as their babysitter.

There are many advantages of being a WAHM because of the flexibility it offers, but also know when to say, "No." Doing occasional favors for family and friends are okay if they really need your help, but it's not okay to make it a regular thing.

One of the reasons you work from home is to have full control of what and when you do things. Take control of your work at home schedule, stick to it and don't let others disrupt it unnecessarily. Once people see you take your work at home job or business seriously, the more likely they will stop dropping by unannounced or calling you to chat.
Work does work but as Zig Ziglar says you have to live your day by a the clock and your life by your vision.

I agree with Suzanne, it can be challenging to work from home but, you do have to set a few guidelines in order to be successful. To have your family on the same page will make all of the difference.

I hope this information helped! I know it was beneficial for me.

Have a productive day!

Lori

Feel free to look at my website at: www.momsforgreen.com

The Right To Lead

"Introduction"
An Excerpt from
The Right to Lead
by John Maxwell

What gives a man or woman the right to lead? It certainly isn't gained by election or appointment. Having position, title, rank or degrees doesn't qualify anyone to lead other people. And the ability doesn't come automatically from age or experience, either.

No, it would be accurate to say that no one can be given the right to lead. The right to lead can only be earned. And that takes time.

The Kind of Leader Others Want to Follow

The key to becoming an effective leader is not to focus on making other people follow, but on making yourself the kind of person they want to follow. You must become someone others can trust to take them where they want to go.

As you prepare yourself to become a better leader, use the following guidelines to help you grow:

1. Let go of your ego.
The truly great leaders are not in leadership for personal gain. They lead in order to serve other people. Perhaps that is why Lawrence D. Bell remarked, "Show me a man who cannot bother to do little things, and I'll show you a man who cannot be trusted to do big things."

2. Become a good follower first.
Rare is the effective leader who didn't learn to become a good follower first. That is why a leadership institution such as the United States Military Academy teaches its officers to become effective followers first - and why West Point has produced more leaders than the Harvard Business School.

3. Build positive relationships.
Leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing less. That means it is by nature relational. Today's generation of leaders seem particularly aware of this because title and position mean so little to them. They know intuitively that people go along with people they get along with.

4. Work with excellence.
No one respects and follows mediocrity. Leaders who earn the right to lead give their all to what they do. They bring into play not only their skills and talents, but also great passion and hard work. They perform on the highest level of which they are capable.

5. Rely on discipline, not emotion.
Leadership is often easy during the good times. It's when everything seems to be against you - when you're out of energy, and you don't want to lead - that you earn your place as a leader. During every season of life, leaders face crucial moments when they must choose between gearing up or giving up. To make it through those times, rely on the rock of discipline, not the shifting sand of emotion.

6. Make adding value your goal.
When you look at the leaders whose names are revered long after they have finished leading, you find that they were men and women who helped people to live better lives and reach their potential. That is the highest calling of leadership - and its highest value.

7. Give your power away.
One of the ironies of leadership is that you become a better leader by sharing whatever power you have, not by saving it all for yourself. You're meant to be a river, not a reservoir. If you use your power to empower others, your leadership will extend far beyond your grasp.

In The Right to Lead, you will hear from and read about people who have done these same things and earned the right to lead others. Because of the courage they found and the character they displayed, other people recognized their admirable qualities and felt compelled to follow them.

The followers who looked to these leaders learned from them, and so can we. As you explore their worlds and words, remember that it takes time to become worthy of followers. Leadership isn't learned or earned in a moment.

To your Success!

Lori

Feel free to check out my website: www.momsforgreen.com

The Law of Progress

This was posted by Amber McGown, who is a great leader on our team, Internet Ceo Moms. She has built a great business and we are lucky to have her as one of our leaders.



One of the outstanding ironies of history is the utter disregard of ranks and titles in the final judgments men pass on each other. The final estimate of men shows that history cares not an iota for the rank or title a man has borne, or the office he has held, but only the quality of his deeds and the character of his mind and heart.

Devotion:
The most uncomfortable place for an entrepreneur is a comfortable place!

The minute anybody comes to the conclusion that he has arrived and he's satisfied and he's gone as far as he wants to go, watch out! -- The minute you get the feeling of, "Ah, I've made it!" -- And you're satisfied with what you've accomplished, that's as far as you get! You never get any further. -- The law of progress is: If you don't keep on getting more, you'll lose what you've got! -- The minute you think you have it and you sit down to enjoy it, that's when you lose it!

This is where most great movements first began to decline: They eased into a false sense of security and complacency, lost sight of their goal -- or lost the faith to attain it -- stopped moving and stopped changing things. -- When you come to the point that you want to stand still, you're going to backslide! -- It is impossible to stand still in a life with purpose! You are either making progress, going ahead, climbing upward everyday a little further, accomplishing more, serving more faithfully, giving more -- or you are slipping backward the other direction and you are on your way down.

Are you alive and going, or dead and settling? Don't settle down and vegetate and become like the rest of the bumps on the logs! -- Rise and live! -- Move now with the life, or you'll be left behind!

Thanks, Amber! Great article! I agree with this Law of Progress. Do not ever settle for something. Keep pushing and help others in the process. Now, that is what it is all about, helping others to succeed.

To your success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Financial Peace

Dave Ramsey is a personal money-management expert, an extremely popular national radio personality, and the best-selling author of The Total Money Makeover. In his latest book, a follow-up of his enormously successful New York Times best-sellers Financial Peace and More Than Enough, Ramsey exemplifies his life’s work of teaching others how to be financially responsible so they can acquire enough wealth to take care of loved ones, live prosperously into old age, and give generously to others.

Dave Ramsey believes in our vision of taking control through owning a home business with our company. He shares his amazing tips and advice on achieving Financial Peace in our monthly magazine.

Thanks Dave!

You can get to know him here:
http://www.daveramsey.com/pr/who-is/

You can also take a few minutes to watch a video of him speaking at Financial Peace University!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLX3wUY1xGg

You DON’T have to take part in the recession. It’s about decision, choice and taking control of your life!

This was posted by our Founder of Internet Ceo Moms, Donna Stewart. She has been helping families reach their goals since 1999.

I wish everyone Financial Peace! I hope you are on your way to achieving it!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com

STAY IN THE GAME IF YOU WANT TO WIN

This is very inspirational. It was posted by one of our leaders on Internet Ceo Moms, Keely Moore. Keely has a very successful business with Internet Ceo Moms and is a great leader. I just loved what she posted.

The more you try, the greater your chance of succeeding.

The law of averages is on your side.

Taking a risk is often your first necessary step toward success.

If you don't take some risks, you won't get the chance to succeed.

While you are trying, you are winning.

Never get discouraged.

Every wrong attempt is another step forward.

People that make no mistakes usually don't make anything.

Make up your mind not merely to overcome a thousand obstacles,

but to win in spite of a thousand defeats.

Your mistakes are stepping stones to success and your installment payments to victory.

You can't be a winner and be afraid to lose.



This is so true, you must not be afraid to take a risk. You will never know until you try. I know I was never a risk taker but, when I was introduced to Internet Ceo Moms I knew I wanted to try it. It was the best decision I ever made regarding starting a business.

I hope this has helped you in some way.

To your Success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com

Online Business Opportunities - 3 Things to look for in a business

This is a great article by Mark Harriman on what to look for in a business opportunity. These were the type of attributes I was looking for in a business. The only thing I would add is you want a business that has high ethics and morals. At least, that was very important to me and I would think it is important to many people.


1. First thing is a powerful business model. When you take a look at the company do you see a company with a firm foundation in the business world and are they using the latest technology and techniques to create wealth.

2. How they are marketing and what type of marketing are they using? This is a vast subject but one that is so key to your success, it can be the difference between success and failure. The world is at your fingertips in the 21st century. You can sit in your bedroom as I am doing now and in a few minutes or hours put together articles, blogs, classified ads or a number of others resources that are out there that will drive traffic you your business. You must be online and you must be online in a big way. So the company that you choose should have some kind of resources for powerful marketing.

3. A powerful mentoring program & educational tools. If you do not have the support that you need in a new venture it is going to be all that much harder. Support from your team and the tools and resources that you are able to tap into when you have time to do so are worth the wait in gold. Lets face it many of us that take the leap to start our own business are not sitting around all day with nothing to do. We have jobs, families and lives that need attending to. So finding a company with the educational tools that can help us make the most out of the time that we do have is key.

Online business opportunities are abundant and it is not easy separating the ones that will give you the best chance for success from the ones that will not. Be diligent in your research and look for the resources that they say that they will provide you with to help you succeed with the business. You have heard of location, location, location, well I would say the key here is resources, resources, resources.
Next find some key elements to marketing online and driving your business forward.

About the Author
Mark Harriman owns and operates an online marketing and mentoring business.

I hope this information helps you decide on what business you would like to pursue.

To your success!

Lori

For more information on Internet Ceo Moms, check out my website at: www.momsforgreen.com

Anybody can achieve anything. Do you believe that? I Do by Donna Stewart

As the story goes, Frank Sinatra got his big break while working as a waiter. One day, as he was waiting tables, who does he see sitting in the restaurant, but one of the biggest names in the music industry.

Old Blue Eyes did the unbelievable: He cleared off a table next to the gentleman and got up on it and sang! He knew he was done at the restaurant for doing so, but how many times would this door of opportunity open up? Needless to say, the rest is history.
You see, you never know when the door of opportunity is going to open wide. For some, the big break comes early in life and for others later on.

But for all of those who become successful, there is one key similarity: They were ready. And for every one of those who were ready, there were thousands more who were not.
So, the principle for us is: Be ready!
Are you ready? When that huge door of opportunity opens up, will you be able to walk boldly through it? Don’t just sit and wish and dream. Be proactive and make sure you are the closest to the door.


When it opens – Be Ready!


Shhh. Do you hear that? Hinges creaking! It is the sound of the door opening. Your door of opportunity! Are you ready?


If you’re ready to make some positive changes in your life, visit my site at
http://www.momsforgreen.com and click on and fill out the Get More Info link. Please put "Call Me"with a good time to call, in the comments field. The information is FREE and there's no pressure or anything like that. Just the facts so you can decide if what we have a good fit for you and your family. I believe you'll be pleasantly impressed.

Those who succeed are those who walk through the door of opportunity when it swings open. We have helped thousands to achieve their goals, and we're looking forward to helping thousands more who are truly ready to open and walk through that door with us!

I think Donna is so right! One day I decided I really needed a positive change in my life, as well as to grow personally. I wanted to find the right business that I would be proud of and be able to stay home with my son. I have found the perfect fit for me, thanks to Donna and the Internet Ceo Moms. I love what I do right from home and I would love to share it with you. We all have choices to make in our lives and it is important we make the right choices for ourselves and our families. It is always a good idea to obtain all of the information before making a choice.

Enjoy a great day and to your success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!

Donna Stewart is the founder of Internet Ceo Moms. She has been helping families work from home since 1999!

MLM's DON'T WORK - Long Term by Donna Stewart

I have had so many people come to me asking me if MLM’s work.

My short answer. No, definitely not long term.

Now, hear me out. I’m not saying Home Businesses don’t work. I’m saying any business that has an MLM business model will not work long term.

Question: Is there an MLM company that started in the USA in the past 30 years, that grew to 300 million in annual sales, and then continued to grow for each of the following 3 years?

Hmmmm? Interestesting question isn’t it. I have yet to find one MLM that meets that criteria.

Why? My theory: MLM’s have a poor business model yet hundreds of new ones pop up every day. (To replace the old ones that have gone under.)Some people will be successful. No question about that. But they are making serious money at the expense of thousands who do not and who will get hurt.

Another Question: If you are currently in an MLM, how many people are you willing to hurt to make money? Some of you may not even realize that you are involved in something that will hurt people and their families financially.

Most leaders that are in MLM companies have come from another and will eventually join another. Again, at the expense of hurting people for their own personal gain.

Now there are some MLM’s that have a product(s) like candles, skin care, Knick Knacks, Kitchen tools etc…and some have great products. However…can you build a long term residual income where you have a customer base that consistently shops month after month?

Then there are MLM’s where it seems just too good. Seriously, you’ve seen the emails and facebook posts right?

GET IN NOW!
SECURE YOUR SPOT!
PRE-LAUNCH
JOIN WHILE IT’S HOT
SEE HOW A 25 YEAR OLD…MADE MILLIONS
ETC…

Enough already! Below I’ve listed “some” MLM companies that are either closed, bankrupt, or on their way out. What MLM is going to be next? It’s just a matter of time. In my humble opinion, the business model does not work long term.

1Network.com
1st Family
1Voice Worldwide
A Better Chance PTY
A1 Internet Service
Accelerated Internet Income Strategies
Acheivers Unlimited
Act II Jewelry – Lady Remington
Active Business Solutions
Adora LLC
AdSavers
Advantage Neutraceuticals
Affordable Luxuries
Albert Konder Collection
AlpineV
AMERICA’S TEAM
American Freeway 100
AmeriKare International
AmeriLat
AmeriTalks
Annasa
ART & SOUL, INC.
Artistic Impressions, Inc
ASN (dba) AMERICAN SHOPPERS NETWORK
Assured Nutrition Plus
ATG TECHNOLOGIES
ATI (dba) ALLIANCE TECHNOLOGY INT’L
ATN
AWARENESS
B & F SYSTEM, INC.
BigSmart
BIMINI ESSENTIALS
Blessed Hope Communications
BODY ELECTRIC
BRIDAL ACCENTS, LTD.
BROAD POINT COMMUNICATIONS
BULLETIN BOARD
Call the Planet ( CTP )
CALLS FOR KIDZ
CAMBRIDGE
CAROLINA FINE COOKIES
CDBN (dba) CONSUMERS DIRECT BUYERS NETWORK
Celestial Harvest
Chantal B – Paris
CharityFirst
Chef Selections
Chef Specialties Company
Cherish Designs
Claudia Jean Collection
Claytime Inc.
ClickIncomes.com
ClubDepot.com
CoffeeFair
COLESCE COUTURE DBA: CAMEO
COOKIE LIFE
CouponsMan
Custom Corner
Cutting Edge Vitamins
CYBERGOLD, INC.
Darswinkle’s Delights
Dashyn Delights
DEBT FREE PUBLISHING, INC. / DBA: DEBT ZAPPER
Denali Health Sciences
DIAMOND CLUB OF AMERICA
DIRECT HOME SHOPPING CLUB (DHSC)
DK FAMILY LEARNING EDUCATIONAL PRODUCTS
Dynasty of Diamonds
E-EXCELL INTERNATIONAL
E-ZINE LIBRARY.COM
EARTH SAFE & WELLNESS TECHNOLOGIES, INC.
EASY MARKETING, INC.
EASY WAY INTERNATIONAL
EMPOWER NET
English Collectables
Entertain with Ease!
ENVION
Environmental Nutrition Network
EonDeck.com
EPIC Network International
ePlanetParadise
ESA-STAR TOUCH INTERNATIONAL
ESSENTIALS BLUE LINE COSMETICS LTD.
Etherea Aromatics
EverydayWealth
Excel Communications
Extreme Research Corp
F.A.I.T.H. Company
FAMILY INTEGRITY BUYLINE, INCL (FIBI)
FAMILY SOLUTION (THE)
Fantasy Inc
FAX BOX NETWORK
Finest Accessories Inc. (The)
FIRST STEP (THE)
FOR YOU, INC.
Fortune21
Fragrant Lemon Peel (the) TFLP
Free Card Matrix
FREE NETWORK (THE)
FREEDOMSTAR COMMUNICATIONS
FuelZone
Fun For Life Club International
FUTURE CITY.COM
FUTURE WORLD
GCMI LONG DISTANCE
Gemcap Equity Management
Geminet
Global Cause
Global Nutrition Network
GLOBAL VILLAGE MARKET
GLOBION
GMT (Get Moving Today)
Gold Entertainment
Golden Neo-Life Diamite International
GOLDEN NEO-LIFE-DIAMITE
GOLDEN NUTRITION
Good Books & Company
Good Nature Company
Great American – The Wholefood Farmacy
GREAT LIFE PRODUCTS
Greeting Cake Company (The)
GULF COAST NUTRITIONAL INC. (dba) NOAH’S ARK
HAND TECHNOLOGIES
HARVEST HOME CANDLES
Harvesting America
HEALTH & NUTRITION NETWORK
HEALTH DYNAMICS RESEARCH
Heart Warming Creations, Inc.
Heart Warming Goodness
HIGHER IDEALS
Highlights-Jigsaw Toy Factory
Holbrook Cottage, Inc
Holiday Magic
Hsin Ten Enterprise USA
I Deal In Travel
I-LINK WORLDWIDE, LLC
IDEA CONCEPTS
IDEAL HEALTH INTERNATIONAL
IDEAL SOLUTIONS INT’L
IDN-NU SKIN INTERNATIONAL
IEXALT FAMILY
IMOGEN CONCEPTS, INC.
INCOMNET COM (SIMPLE2 NET)
INNOVATIVE TECHNOLOGIES CORP OF AMERICA
Integrated Synergy
INTELLIGENT NUTRITION SYSTEMS, INC
International Team Works
INTERNET 4 FAMILIES (I4F)
IONX RESOURCE
iPowerBiz
IT’S LIFE
JAPAN LIFE AMERICA CORP.
JET SET LIFE TECHNOLOGIES, INC.
Jewel Way
Joielle
JS Homestyle
Just Add Guests
Kanosis
KAREMORE INTERNATIONAL
KASEY’S COUPONS
Kat’s Coffees
KIDZ BOULEVARD
KINETIC RESOURCE INTERNATIONAL
KINGS CHOICE
KINGSWAY, INC.
Kitchen Fair (Regal Ware)
KM.net 1/1/2005
L.E.A.P. (LIFE, EDUCATION & PROSPERITY, INC.)
Ladybug Garden Parties
Laga Designs
LAMETCO
Le Club Prive
LE NATUREL
Let’s Do Tea LLC
Lexli MD, Inc.
LIFE DYNAMICS INTERNATIONAL
LIFE LINK, LTC.
LIFE SCIENCE TECHNOLOGY
LIFE STYLES USA
LifeMist Home Products
LifesMiracle
LifeSpan International
LIFETEK CORPORATION
LIGHTHOUSE AMERICA
Longevity Network
LUXELLE INTERNATIONAL
LYC INTERNATIONAL
Magnus Enterprises
MARK I OF NORTH AMERICA
MARKET PLACE INTERNATIONAL
MARKET TO SUCCESS
MAXXIS 2000
Mayberry America
MIRACLE MAIL.COM
MLM BANNER EXCHANGE
MLM COMMUNITY.COM
MLM SEARCH.COM
MLM World News Today
MOUNTAIN GOURMET
Movie Club Plus
Muscle Dynamics Fitness Network
My Tax Man
N.A.T.A.L.
NANCI CORPORATION
NATIONAL BENEFITS & SERVICES
National Bodycare
NATIONAL CALLING CARD ASSOCIATES
National Companies
NATIONAL SAFETY ASSOCIATES (NSA)
Natural Air Products
NATURAL BODY LINES
Natural Health Trends Corp
Nature’s Gold International
NATURE’S HEALING AROMATHERAPY, INC.
NATURE’S VERY BEST
NATURES BODYCARE
NATURES WEALTH
NaturScience
NetmarkAid
NEURO-HEALTH (BECALM’D)
New Century Life
NEW LIFE TECHNOLOGIES, INC.
New Quest International
NEW RESOLUTION, INC. (NRI)
NSA
NTA (dba) NATIONAL TELECOM ASSOCIATION, INC.
NU BOTANIC INTERNATIONAL
Nutrition For Life
Oasis Lifesciences
OC Rebates
OceanCity Network
October Trading
ONE Group
ONE SOURCE WORLDWIDE NETWORK
ONE WORLD ONLINE
ORIGINAL SOLUTIONS INC.
Our Family Favorites
OXFORD SAVINGS CLUB
P.S. I Love You, Inc
PAINT BOX COMPANY (THE)
Pamper My Baby
Patchwork & Preserves
PetShop.biz
PetsParty
Phoenix Cookes
PixMeUp 1/1/2005
PlantMakers
Platinum Travel Club
Pola USA
Popular Club, Inc.
Power of Nature
PremierNet Plus
PriceNetUSA
Primebuy International
Pro-Ma Systems
PROFIT CENTRAL, INC.
prowealthSOLUTIONS
PTI
Purchase Plus Buyers
PurchasePro
Quiet Place for You
Quorum
R GARDEN INTERNATIONAL
RACHAEL INTERNATIONAL
REAL LIFE SOLUTIONS, INC.
ReferralWare International
RENAISSANCE FOR LIFE
Retire on Spending
RICH PLAN OF FLORIDA
RMC Group, Inc.
ROSEMARIE COLLECTIONS
Savory Naturals
SCRIPTURES
Sea Alive
Seaborne, LLC
SeAcai
SECURE INDEPENDENCE
Self Indulgence
SERENITY
Shades of Color
Shoppers Central
ShrimpUSA
SILVER BUYERS CLUB (THE)
SMART RESPONDER.COM
smartmall.biz
Solutions Immunity Enhancement
Sound Cafe.com
SOUND TRAVELS (div SOUNDS EXCITING)
SOUTHERN HERITAGE, INC.
Southwestern Company (THE)
SPRINGBOARD
SPRINGWELLNESS
STEAK BUYERS CLUB
Stella -n- Dot
Stoxrus
SUNRISE DIRECT
SUPRA/LIFE SOARING EAGLE VENTURES, INC.
Surfing2Cash
Sweet Berry Designs
Sweet Prairie Soap Company
T-Shirts with a Personal Touch
TALISMAN
TapCity
Taste D-Vine
TBN – The Benefits Network
Team Effort International
TEL-A-NATION
TERAFORMA HEALTH
Terra Mezzo
The Furnished Garden
The Topline
Total Life Changes (TLC)
TOTAL SUCCESS SOLUTIONS, INC.
Totally Tropical Interiors
TRADE EXCHANGE NETWORK
Traditions, Inc
TRAFFIC DIRECTORY.COM
Travel Legacy
Travel Promotions International
Travel Reaction
TravelMax International
Travelogia
Treasure Traders International
TRENDMARK INTERNATIONAL
Trilogy International
TruDynamics (Travel Dynamics)
UCS (dba) AMERICANS FOR CONSTITUTIONAL ACTION
UltimateMatch
Uni-Body International
UNIQUE OPPORTUNITIES, INC.
UNITED SUPER ACCOUNT PROGRAM
Universal Lifestyles
US DIAL1
US Health Advisors
USTELETRICITY NETWORK
VIRTUALLY FREE INTERNET
VISION QUEST WORLDWIDE, INC.
Vita Genesis
Vitacube
Vitagenex
VITALITY LABS
VITALITY LIFE CHOICE
VIVA MARKETING
Viva Toxic Free
Viviane Woodward
VOYAGER GROUP, INC. (THE)
WACHTER’S ORGANIC SEA PRODUCTS
WESTERN MARKETING
wfhTravel
WICKER PLUS, LTD.
WORLD GOLF CORP
WORLD NET INTERNATIONAL, INC.
World Wide Alliance Corp (WWA USA)
WORLD WIDE INTERNET MARKETING
WORLD WIDE LINK, INC. (dba) THEWWWLINK
WORLD X CHANGE COMMUNICATIONS
WORLDWIDE
WORLDWIDE NETWORK INCORPORATED (BETA SOURCE)
XPI Online
XtremeHealth Formulas
YOUNGER LIVING, INC.
Your Family First
YourNetPlus.Com
YouthFlow
ZeBlooms
ZENITH 4 THE PLANET

Quite the list isn’t it? Sadly, there are more.

I will be writing a follow up article about “True Residual Income” as well as the MLM “Guru’s” who have created ways to get fellow MLM’ers to purchase their training to help them build their MLM business.

Really?? You’re going to help someone become successful in something that is eventually going to fail? Perhaps they do this to earn more money for themselves and so that they have a list of people to promote the next venture they jump in to?

My personal goal is to educate people on the realities of having a real, lucritive, long term home business and to help to achieve whatever their goals might be.

So what did you think? I always love hearing your feedback, so please leave me a comment down below with questions, thoughts, or feedback. And (yes, here’s my call to action) please share this post with your Twitter and FB friends by clicking on the share buttons below. I totally appreciate it!! Thanks so much for spending time with me here today!

To your success!

Donna Stewart
Founder of Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Families Work From Home Since 1999!

For more information check out my website: www.momsforgreen.com

How to Be Coachable & Get the Most From Your Mentor

This is another great article on how to be coachable By Yoji Cole

Here are five other tips on how to be coachable and get the most from your mentor:

1. Ask for feedback
To learn who you are as a worker, ask your supervisor for feedback on your work ethic, strengths and weaknesses.

"Ask pointed questions right after you complete a project or important meeting," says Anne Marie Yarwood, vice president of human resources and head of diversity for JPMorgan Chase's investment bank (JPMorgan Chase is No. 13 on the DiversityInc Top 50 list). "During the walk back to your desk and while it is fresh in someone's mind, test their perceptions to learn their suggestions for your improvement. That tells them you want to be developed."

"Have the courage to ask the question even if you don't like the answer," says Douglas. "Have the ability to ask the questions, because often when I'm coaching people or giving feedback, I encourage them to go to a person, such as their boss--break through the fears."

If you are aware of your strengths and weaknesses, you will not take criticism as a personal affront, says Kym Ward Gaffney, national director of coaching at PricewaterhouseCoopers, No. 4 on the DiversityInc Top 50 list.

"Know how to not get defensive when your leader offers alternative behaviors or disagrees with your approach, because self-awareness is knowing when you become sensitive," says Ward Gaffney. "Be able to suspend judgment; be aware of your strengths and weaknesses; it all signals maturity. It means we can objectively listen to feedback without having the need to be right."

2. Reach out to a mentor who is different from you
A male executive who seeks a mentor who is a senior female executive, or an executive without a disability who seeks a mentor with a disability, for example, will learn more because they're reaching outside familiar territory.

"If your network is not diverse, then you're most likely to get stuck because people in your network will see things like you do, which is affirming but not helpful when you're stuck, "says Yarwood.

She also suggested a method of approaching a mentor who does not share an executive's personal traits. "You might want to think of what you can do for the person," says Yarwood. "Offer to get involved in something they're working on."

Seek the common areas about which people can bond, says Ward Gaffney: "When you are being coached [by] someone who appears different from you, then you make the extra effort to seek points of commonality. Just because someone is physically disabled doesn't mean you don't share some interests. You should look beyond the physical to the core values that you both share."

A method of developing that personal relationship is revealing extra involvement with projects outside of an executive's division, involvement with an employee-resource group or external professional groups. Dr. Cole says taking a mentor to a favorite food spot or event can reveal an executive's interests outside of work. Developing a relationship with a mentor can also be accomplished by inviting "one's coach to a meeting of their LGBT employee-resource group or [inviting a coach to one's] church or synagogue or temple," she says.

3. Know your prospective mentor
Research the senior executive you want as a mentor to learn his or her educational and professional background. The information learned can serve as an opening to ask for the executive's mentoring expertise.

Dr. Cole says this is a great way to open the request for mentoring: "'I've read your biography and certainly know who you are; would you allow me to briefly share my story?'"

"Do your homework to learn who the coach is as a person," says Ward Gaffney. Your research can also help you determine whether or not the mentor is likely to be good for you. Earlier in her career, Ward Gaffney's excitement at being assigned to work with a female leader turned to disappointment when Ward Gaffney discovered that none of the female leader's past mentees were promoted after their time with her.


4. Set up specific expectations
The more specific you and your mentor are about each of your goals for the relationship, the more beneficial the relationship will be to both parties. Yarwood says using broad terms to define a mentoring relationship and not reporting the results will set up the relationship to fail. A common mistake she says is to use broad terms instead of being specific.

"Ask specific questions about where you want feedback or coaching, and when someone has invested time helping you, then let them know the result. That lets them know you're willing to get feedback and act on it," says Yarwood.

"You should always set up a professional-development contract, and that means you are proactively seeking an agreement with your coach that you will create a receptive relationship where you are willing to receive feedback," says Ward Gaffney. "The first thing you can say is that you want to be receptive and you want to have a dialogue with them. You have to establish intentions and actions at the beginning. You're trying to set up mutual accountability."

Mutual accountability gives both parties a framework for formal follow-up meetings at which you and your mentor share in your professional growth. Scheduling formal meetings will ensure that a mentor has set aside time for tutoring and is mentally present.

"[The person being coached] must develop the spirit around which you will receive feedback," says Ward Gaffney. "Consistently and strategically ask for feedback. Don't ask for feedback when the coach is pressed for time. You want to make sure you are letting the coach know you expect feedback. If you don't make time to receive feedback, then it looks like you don't want the feedback."

Make sure your goals include what you can do for your mentor. "This is a business relationship that is expected to benefit both parties. Establish that reciprocity is going on," says Dr. Cole.

Mentoring relationships that focus only on what the mentor can provide dissolve because of a lack of reciprocity, says Dr. Cole: "Any human relationship involves reciprocity." She adds that an executive should involve their mentor in their extracurricular business activities.


5. Show that you learn from mistakes; don't be afraid to fail
It is the demonstration of leadership skills that eventually earns an executive a leadership position. One method to show leadership is by admitting you don't know it all and that you can and do make mistakes.

"I think a good leader is willing to show other people that they don't know everything, that they have frailties and that they're willing to honestly share that with other people," says Douglas. "That opens them up to learning when they admit they don't know everything."

And do not fear failure. "Failure is one of the best ways to grow and learn. Until we have some [failures], we go through life merrily thinking about life one way. Failure is about growth and learning from that," says Douglas.

Tell your mentor what you've learned. "Always indicate you're learning and willing to stretch yourself because then people see you're not stuck in your comfort zone and seek continued improvement and to stretch your skill set," says Ward Gaffney. "If after receiving feedback, you crumble, people will say, 'I'll never coach that person again. We should critique ourselves but not so that we critique ourselves out of action."

These are great tips on how everyone can be coachable.

To your success!

Lori

Lori McDowell
Internet Ceo Moms
Helping Moms Work From Home since 1999!
www.MomsForGreen.com!